It is the end of January 2021. Did anyone make any goals or resolutions? Did anyone stick to them? Are people feeling generally stuck and that although on the one hand we have endless amounts of time, on the other we don’t really have the time to do the things we want, or need, to do? Are we feeling like we aren’t doing much but what we are doing is taking up a lot of effort, and we are too tired to do any more things?
These are some of the things that I am hearing from clients and friends. I would be interested to hear your take on this time and how you are feeling right now.
A MORI poll showed that “Six in ten Britons (60%) say they are finding it harder to stay positive day-to-day compared with before the virus” and that nearly 70 % of women aged 18-75 are finding it hard to stay positive on a day to day basis. People are generally worried about the virus itself and about how and when things might return to normal.
That is certainly a lot of people feeling a lot of stress. One positive thing about this is that if you are one of them, now you know that you are very much not alone! You are in the majority. You are ‘the new normal’.
Accepting that things are hard right now and that it is normal to struggle with this situation can be a relief in itself. There are also many things that we can do to ease these feelings and to make a life a bit happier.
The general air of uncertainty and anxiety, combined with the lack of control we have over this, and how long it might last, are resulting in many people feeling either anxious or exhausted. However there are things that we can do to make it a little bit easier.
We need to look after ourselves as best we can, both mentally and physically. When we are feeling overwhelmed it can be hard to focus on what we need or on what we could do to feel better. We need to keep our expectations of ourselves, and others, realistic. We could aim to do just one thing a day for our mental and physical health.
We can focus on the aspects of life that we can control - making sure we are eating something healthy, that we are aiming for a regular bedtime routine, and attempting to get some fresh air and some exercise.
We can choose what we focus on and we can increase this ability by practising mindfulness, even for just a few minutes a day. We can choose to spend a few minutes now and again to focus on what we are grateful for. Gratitude has been scientifically proven to have a positive impact on our thought patterns. Just remembering each day what we have to feel grateful for can have a powerful effect. The effect is increased if you write them down, but you could just remember them, or mention them, maybe to the people you feel grateful for.
We can apply mindfulness to everyday activities like showering. It sounds easy but next time just notice where your mind goes while you are in the shower. Try to take those few minutes to just focus on the smell of the shower gel and the feel of the water. Each time you take a few minutes out of worrying, it will help to increase your sense of calm and will help to remind you to do it again. This can stop the spiral of anxiety or depression which is so common at the moment.
There are some more suggestions in my e-book “How to use Mindfulness for Stress and Uncertain Times” available here: https://pennymetcalfmindfulness.m-pages.com/stress_ebook
For the moment, just know that you are not alone and that small changes in what you do and what you think can make a big difference to how you feel. Having a coach can help you to put things into action in a way that fits into your own lifestyle and fits your own needs. It allows you to commit to a level of activity that is appropriate and manageable for you.
For today maybe just commit to doing one thing for your mental and physical health and let me know how that goes.